I think this is going to be my hardest year... Oy :/

Well.. I'm back to square one. I worked for almost 5 months at a job i absolutely loved. Today Amanda tells me "Casey wants to talk to you." I leave the register and walk over to him. He says "Come up stairs, this will just take a minute." I follow him upstairs to the office. I walk in and my district manager is sitting their with this corporate guy. I said "Hello Mr.Quinn, How are you today?" He replies with "I'm alright Audriana, How are you?" "Not too bad" i said with a smile as i sat down. I introduced myself to the corporate guy, I dont quite recall his name. He says "Have a seat Audriana" I asked "what is this pertaining to?" He replies with "Well, as you know, the economy is in a rough spot" Right when he said that, i knew what was going on. I got the feeling in my throat right after you dry swallow a big pill, my stomach felt like it was going to fall out the back of me. I thought to myself silently "oh jesus no, please god no" He explained to me that they need to save jobs for people with kids, bills to pay, etc. He gave me my final paycheck as tears spilled out of my eyes like a waterfall. As i walked out of the office Casey gave me a hug and told me "Audriana, your a hardworker, where ever you end up they will be lucky to have you" I cried even harder after that. I walked out of Walgreens with my final paycheck, walked up the road aways to the soda shoppe, enjoyed some fries and a sprite, and waited for my grandfather to pick me up.

I loved my job. I felt blessed to have a good paying job that i liked. Everyone was so nice to me. I got a few snotty customers here and there, but i didn't mind them. It was pretty good pay for an 18 year old still living at home with no bills to pay. But i guess thats just the way life goes.

5 days after the new year begins, I Lose JJ... The Love Of My Life, My Husband To Be, The One I Dropped Everything For.
About a month and 9 days after that.. I Lose My Wonderful Job.

I am absolutely scared to death.. too ask the question... "What else is going to be snatched away from me?".. "Whats next?"

This year isn't looking good for me. They say everything happens for a reason... I would like to know the reason these two things happened to me now... I would prefer not to wait.

"Something to do with my hands" By Her Space Holiday.. Is gonna be on repeat on my ipod for a while. :(

God in heaven, Please send me some guidance.. Please